Two Months Old

April 23, 2013

Lillian-
Thank you so much for making the past 2 months the best months of my life!  I am loving every second of you and I am so thankful that God chose me to be your mommy!  It's crazy to think that you have been in this world for 2 months already!  You are growing so fast.  You have pretty much outgrown all of your newborn sized clothes and are wearing 0-3 month size now.  You are getting really long and it makes us wonder if you are going to be tall.  Maybe you will get some height from your DeDe (my mommy).   I have been back at work now for about 3 weeks.  It is so hard to leave you in the mornings, but it gets a little (really a teeny tiny bit) easier every day.  While I am at work you get to spend the day with your daddy and sometimes your Nonna and Poppaw (your daddy's parents).  You already have your daddy wrapped around your finger.  He takes great pride in taking care of you, and I must say he does a wonderful job!  He always has you dressed so cute and you are in a wonderful mood when I get home in the evening.  Your daddy says you still love to eat a lot during the day, in fact, you were getting upset because your milk wasn't coming out of your bottles fast enough, so we had to switch to a faster flowing nipple!  You are still eating every 2-3 hours during the day, but then you sleep most of the night.  On a typical night you go to bed around 10pm and then wake up between 4am and 6am to eat and then you go back to sleep.  You usually let your daddy sleep in a little and don't wake up again until 10am or 11am.  I know he really likes that!  During the day your daddy tries to get you to do tummy time each day, and most days you will tolerate it for 10 minutes or so.  You are very good at holding your head up!!  You also like to lay on your gym mat and kick your legs while you look at yourself in the mirror hanging above you.  You think it's so funny seeing that baby (yourself) in the mirror smiling at you! Bath time is still one of your favorite things.  You have outgrown the sling/hammock that was in your bathtub, so you now lay in your baby tub like a big girl, and you are even starting to kick your legs and move your arms around to splash in the water, but you don't like it when you splash yourself in the face.  Your baby acne and cradle cap went away for a while but it has shown it's ugly self again causing us to wash your hair and ears with Selsun Blue again.  I'm hoping once we get rid of it this time it won't come back anymore!  After your bath your daddy always rubs lotion on your feet and it makes you giggle.  It's so cute to see you laugh and to know that you are ticklish on your feet!  We are continuing to go to the park for walks, and you have even been on a couple of park dates (one with Luke and one with Evan) this past month.  It is amazing to me how much you are growing and learning and changing every day.  You are such a "big girl" compared to just one month ago.  You are "talking" to us more and you think it's so funny when we "talk" like you do.  Your daddy and I were talking the other night about how some days we still can not believe that you are our baby.  I don't think you will ever truly know how proud we are of you and how much we love you!  Like I said before, thank you for making the past 2 months the best months of my life.  I love you baby girl, more than you will ever know!
All my love sweet girl,
Mommy

11 lb 3 oz and 22 3/4 in long

Things she is loving: "talking" with her mommy and daddy, 

chewing on her hands (mainly her thumb and index finger), bath time, 

the swing, walks, kicking her legs

Things she is not a fan of:  hiccups, being in her carseat without it moving, 

having her face wiped, cold milk, shots (getting her vaccinations wore her out!)

We made it!

Yes, we made it through our first week of me working and Lillian staying with her daddy. I went back to work this past Tuesday. I woke up on time Tuesday morning and everything went as I had planned. Lillian woke up before I left and I was able to feed her and then she went back to sleep so her daddy could sleep in. It didn't hit me that I was having to leave my baby girl for the entire day until I was in the car driving to work. I then started to cry! I made myself dry up the tears and put my big girl pants on because I couldn't go back to work looking a hot mess. The day at work went great. I can not say enough good things about my job and the people I work with. They are so understanding and supportive and made my pregnancy so much easier and now the working mommy issues. I was definitely slow my first day back but it was like riding a bike. I was quickly able to remember how to do things and by the 2nd and 3rd day I was able to take the training wheels off. :)
God really had this planned out for Jon and I when he blessed us with our new jobs in 2012 and now our baby girl in 2013. It's just another reminder of why I always need to have faith in Him and His plan and timing. Jon did bring Lillian to visit me at work on Tuesday afternoon. He had her looking so cute in a dress and wearing a bow! I was one proud mommy and wife!
On Thursday Jon had to go to the hospital for a few hours for an inservice. My MIL came over and watched Lillian. I am very thankful that we have her to help out and watch our precious girl when we have to work!
Jon did great with Lillian all week! She was pretty fussy Friday, but he managed to handle it and they both made it through the day. He was able to stop by my work for a visit that day, and I showed Lillian off to everyone at the office.
Jon did not have to be on call any this past week because he took a few days off in order to get used to taking care of Lillian. This week coming up he will be on call on Tuesday and Thursday. My MIL will be available those days if needed. Hopefully this next week goes just as good as the past and hopefully it continues to get easier to leave for work in the mornings. When I get off work in the afternoon now all I want to do is cuddle with my sweet girl. It melts my heart to see her sweet smile when I get home after missing her all day!!

Please excuse me, I'm new!

There have been quite a few instances when the people around us are thinking "they are obviously new parents"...
Like the times we have taken her to a restaurant (at non busy times of course) and sat at a table far away from everyone else with her carseat covered so no one can see her or breathe on her...
Or when we went to the grocery store and had no clue what to do with her carseat so Jon put her carseat in a buggy and wheeled it around and I had my own buggy for the groceries...
Or when she starts screaming in public and I have to feed her, so I go to the car, and when I return I have spit up/ milk/ pee and maybe poo on my shirt, the crotch of my pants, and on her clothes.  (We haven't mastered nursing in public quite yet, but I suppose practice makes perfect?!)...
And don't forget the time she pooed out of her diaper on to her pants, and this new mom did not have a spare outfit for her, so sweet girl had to go pantless with a blanket wrapped around her because it was chilly outside...
Or how about the time I thought I was being smart and prepared and brought milk (non frozen) with us in an insulated bag with an ice pack, only to find that when I went to pour the milk into the bottle it was frozen (dang good ice pack!) and had to thaw it by putting it in my armpit.
I guess you live and you learn, right?

One Month Old

March 23, 2013
Lillian-
  Happy 1 month birthday my sweet girl!  We have sure learned a lot about each other in the last 4 weeks.   I am really loving watching you grow and learn, but please stop growing up so fast.  You are starting to outgrow your newborn sized outfits.  In fact, you can't wear your newborn jammies anymore, only the 0-3 month size.  I am so glad you smile so much because your smile is contagious.  You smile as you are falling asleep, while you are sleeping, and when your daddy and I talk to you in funny voices.   I know they say you are not technically "old enough" to smile on purpose, but it sure does seem like you smile at us and our silly talking sometimes.  We are enjoying the fact that you are having more awake times these days.  Although you did go through a phase of being super fussy between the hours of 9pm and 1am, I think you are over that now (at least I am hoping so!).  When you are awake you love to look around at the lights and at me and your daddy.  You are enjoying laying on your back kicking your legs and swinging your arms, and you are starting to make all sorts of noises and sounds while doing so.  You will tolerate tummy time for a short period and you are getting stronger every day at holding your head up.  You are pretty good at holding your head up and steady but you tire out quickly and your head becomes floppy again.  You have become great at nursing.  I was worried in the beginning, but I think we both figured it out and made it work together.  You sure do like to eat!  You are eating every 2-3 hours during the day and then after your night feed (which is usually between 9:30 and 10:30 pm) you sleep until you wake again to eat sometime between 4 and 6 am.  I am really enjoying that long period of sleep!  Thank you!  Your daddy has given you a few bottles and you have done great with those too.  We are trying to slowly introduce you to the bottle so you will be ready when I have to go back to work.  I have no doubt you will do just fine!  Unfortunately you have a terrible case of baby acne right now.  Your daddy and I are ready for your skin to clear up!  No matter what though, you are still a beautiful girl!  Your daddy and I have been giving you a bath every other day.  We really look forward to bath days.  You love to take a bath!  We get the bathroom all warm and cozy for you and turn on some baby tunes and you know it's time!  You are always so happy and calm during your bath!  This past month has been such a life changing experience and I am loving every second of it.  When I was carrying you in my tummy I would pray that you would be a healthy and happy baby.  Now I thank God for answering that prayer and I ask that he continue to bless you with good health and a happy heart.  Your daddy and I feel so blessed to be your parents.  We love you more than we ever thought possible!
All my love sweet girl,
Mommy

(We were not in the mood to take pictures this day...of course!)

9lbs 11oz and 21.5 inches

Nicknames: Lilly, Pretty Girl, Punkin, Sweet Angel, Lil' G (by our nieces), and LG (by my sister)

Things she is loving: laying on her mommy or daddy's chest, chewing on her hands, having her hands by her face, eating, baths, riding in the car, going for walks, the bouncer seat

Things she is not a fan of: being hungry, any type of pacifier, the bulb suction (because of her reflux we have to suction her nose sometimes)

One Hot Momma

One hot momma is what I would like to be!  haha!  Maybe not "hot" but I definitely want to get back to the weight I was before Miss Lillian came into our lives.  In fact, I would like to get back to what I looked like when I got married.

**GOAL**

I gained a total of 57 pounds throughout the 10 months of pregnancy.  I lost 34 in the first 2 weeks!  Majority of that was fluid!  I was SO puffy at the end of the pregnancy and for the first week after I had her.  I still have 23 pounds to go to get back to where I started, but I would really like to lose 25-30 more pounds.  

Breastfeeding has helped me to watch what I eat, somewhat.  I still have a ridiculous sweet tooth.  It is nothing for me to eat a bowl of ice cream every night!  This can't keep happening if I want to lose 25-30 more pounds! I don't want to really limit my calories too much just yet because I am breastfeeding, but I need to eat healthier.  I have been eating a bowl of cereal or oatmeal for breakfast.  For lunch it is usually left overs or a turkey sandwich.  For dinner I have been eating whatever is available.  We were very fortunate to have people bring us dinner for the first 2 weeks we were home.  This past week we have ordered out a lot and I have cooked just a couple of times.   I did sit down and make out our menu for this next week, so I have plans to cook more.   Unfortunately I couldn't resist buying Easter candy the other day, so that has been a weakness too.  I need to dig deep down inside and find the will power to say no to all these sweets.  Today I did skip on the chocolate Easter eggs and ate some strawberries instead.  It wasn't what I wanted, but it worked for the time being.  

I have been trying to walk as often as possible.  I do wish our neighborhood was bigger so that it was worth it to walk around.  We have to load up the car with the stroller and all the goods, including the baby, and head to the park if I want to get a good walk in.  It ends up working out though, because it is nice to get out of the house, especially on a beautiful day!  Eventually I will get to working on my "core."  It is nice and flabby now that it has stretched to infinity and beyond.  I read that you are not supposed to start doing abdominal exercises until 6-8 weeks postpartum.  I only had to read that once to convince myself that I need to wait! :)  I have my 6 week check up the second week in April so at that time I will ask the doc what I can do and what she suggests I do.  Once I get the clear from my doctor to get a move on I plan to really get after it with this weight loss plan. One work out I did get the other day was toting sweet girl around in her car seat!  OMG!  I should have some toned arms in no time, well at least my right arm since that's the one I always use to carry her.  

For now I suppose I will do my best to eat right and continue to walk...

Time Flies

Time seems to be literally flying by!  I can not believe I have been a mommy for 3 weeks and that our sweet baby is 21 (22 to be exact) days old!  Life has changed drastically in the past 3 weeks and I am loving every minute of it.  Over the past week we've had quite a bit going on.  At the beginning of the week Kelli and Evan came over for lunch.  God definitely had a plan when he decided for Kelli and I to have a baby at the same time.  It is nice to share stories and compare experiences of our little ones. It is going to be so fun to see them grow up together!

[Evan and Lillian]

Her cord fell off so we were finally able to give her a bath in her tub.  She loves bath time!

[so relaxed]

We've been to the park a few times this week for walks.  One of the days she decided she wanted to eat before the walk and she definitely could not wait until it was over.  That was our first experience of nursing in public.  It went better than I had expected, but it was still pretty tough. 

This past Friday we went back to the hospital where she was born for her to have an ultrasound done on the sacral dimple she has.  She did wonderful the whole time and slept.  The rad tech who did the ultrasound initially had me a nervous wreck.  I decided that he must not have to do ultrasounds on babies often and definitely not on baby spinal cords.  By his facial expressions and nervous talking, it was obvious as he was doing the ultrasound he thought he was seeing something bad.  I didn't have a clue what we were looking at on the screen, so I was very nervous.  I ended up sitting back in a chair, sweating and praying.  The rad tech decided to get the radiologist in there for his opinion.  I was quickly put at ease once the doctor came in and looked around.  He said everything looked great to him.  Apparently the rad tech was not getting a good look at a certain area of her spinal cord and was thinking their was an abnormality.  The radiologist assured us that everything looked as it should and our baby was in fact healthy.  I was able to breathe again and immediately said a prayer of thanks!

Our nights have been good for the most part.  She has been sleeping good, only waking to eat every 3-4 hours.  We will have the occasional night when she doesn't want to sleep and just wants to be awake and check things out.  Although it is exhausting, as long as she is not crying and upset, I am fine with her just wanting to be awake every now and then at night.  I know that it will soon get better.  I just have to keep reminding myself that she is only 3 weeks old!

We introduced her to the bottle for the first time last night.  We decided that we wanted to slowly get her used to having bottles every now and then so that when I went back to work it wasn't thrown at her all at once.  At first she was not sure about the thing, but after some coaxing she realized what to do and ended up doing great.  I think Jon enjoyed being able to feed her as well. 

Everyday when I look at her I am reminded of God's love for us!  He has definitely blessed me and Jon with a healthy and happy baby.  I don't know what I did to deserve such a precious baby, but I am very thankful.  I pray now that I will know how to raise her, how to teach her to love others unconditionally, and how to be a servant of the Lord.  

Oh, and Happy St. Patrick's Day!

These days...

These days all seem to be running together. If it weren't for the sun setting and rising I wouldn't know my days from nights, mainly because Lillian seems to have them confused too! Sweet girl has been super fussy in the evenings which continues into the night. Four hours of sleep in a night means we had a good night! I thought at first she was going through a growth spurt, and then I thought she was wanting to cluster feed in the evenings, but I'm clueless as to what is going on. She also refuses a pacifier! We have tried 3 different types and drama queen gags with every one of them. As I am typing this she is actually asleep in her daddy's arms. Tonight has been a much better night than the past few so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that things are going to continue to be better!
I feel like we are constantly going to the doctor. Lillian had her 2 week visit this past Friday. She weighs 8 lbs 7 oz now. The doctor thought she still looked jaundice so they checked her total and direct bilirubin. Her bilirubin is just fine so apparently our little girl just has a yellow tint to her complexion. She has a sacral dimple. The doc doesn't seem to think it is anything to be worried about. For peace of mind we have to take her to have an ultrasound on Friday to be certain that it is in fact nothing to worry about.
I went back to the doctor today for a follow-up. My blood pressure has been great so the doctor told me to stop taking the blood pressure med. I also found out that I have lost 34 lbs in the past 2 weeks! I have definitely felt smaller because my swelling has finally gone away! I have veins and bones in my feet again! It's crazy to think that I was probably carrying around at least 15 pounds of excess fluid! Glad all that is gone! Now just 23 pounds to go before I'm back at my pre-pregnant weight.
Two things that have happened so far this week (and it's only Monday)...we took Lillian to a restaurant for the first time! We left my appointment today and were both super hungry. Since it was still early we figured we could beat the lunch crowd, so we introduced our girl to Superior. We sat on the patio away from the other 2 tables of people and kept her carrier covered with a blanket. Yes, we are probably over protective, but better safe than sorry, right? She slept the whole time and we finished just as it was getting busy. The other thing is that her cord fell off! It had been hanging by a string for a few days and it finally went in its way! Now we can introduce Lillian to her bathtub. I hope she likes it has much as she does her sponge baths! Bath time is something we all look forward to!
Well I better go get some shut eye while she is. Here's to hoping she actually sleeps tonight!...

Lillian's Birth Story {Part 2}

We arrived at the Labor & Delivery unit where I had Jon park in the parking lot instead of dropping me off at the door.  We walked up to the door and rang the bell (it's a locked unit from the inside and out).  A nurse came to the door a few minutes later and asked if we were there for a tour.  I thought to myself "who would want to tour a labor unit at 10:30 on a Saturday morning?"  Instead of saying what I was thinking, I politely declined and told her that I thought I was in labor.  She let us in and proceeded to walk away.  Jon and I looked at each other and he spoke up and asked her if we were supposed to be following her or waiting, she replied by telling us to follow her.  We walked into room 140 in which all the lights were off and the nurse began messing with a machine.  Jon and I were beginning to become frustrated at this point because we felt as though we needed some explanation or even an introduction.  I am not sure what came over me but suddenly I spoke up and asked the nurse her name and introduced Jon and myself and then told her that this was our first child, our first experience with all of this, and that she was going to need to be more informative.  At that point I am pretty sure I caught the nurse off guard, but she did do a 180 and was very nice and explained everything that she was doing from that point on.  I undressed and put the hospital gown on and for some reason that made things seem more real to me.   The nurse put the two monitors on my belly (one to monitor the contractions and the other to monitor the baby's heart rate).  Hearing Lillian's heart beat was such a calming and surreal sound.  It brought me a feeling of peace knowing she was doing good inside my belly.  The nurse also checked to see how far dilated I was and she said I was still at 2 cm.  This news was pretty disappointing.
Since my doctor gave me her cell number a few days before I decided to call her as we were headed to the hospital to let her know we were on our way.  I left a voice message.  Once we got to the hospital Jon also called and left her a voice message.  The nurse told us that she called the doctor on call and he would be in shortly to check things out.  I was not too thrilled because the doctor on call was my original OB/GYN doctor the first time I ever went and I did not like his bedside manner.  (Needless to say I switched doctors after my first visit with him)  About an hour after we settled in, the on call doctor came in and took a look at the strip recording my contractions, which were still about 5 minutes apart.  He also checked to see if I was dilated anymore and at this point he said I was 3 cm.  He felt as though I was progressing well on my own and that I would most likely have a baby that night.  This was wonderful news!  By this time the contractions, which were all in my back, were becoming more uncomfortable so the doctor ordered for me to get vistaril to help me relax a little. (On a side note, I have to admit that the doctor was very nice and this experience with him was much better than the first encounter we had.)  I waited about an hour and there was no relief.  I ended up asking the nurse if I could walk the halls because laying in the bed seemed to be making it more uncomfortable.  Walking did help!
My doctor called the unit to check on me and ended up coming in about 2:30 that afternoon.  She checked and at this point I was 4 cm dilated and 100% effaced.  She liked the progress I was making.  She decided to order lab and get the ball rolling for me to get the epidural and she also decided to break my water.  In order to get the epidural all the lab has to be drawn and you have to get 1 liter of IV fluids.  The reason for the fluids is because the epidural can cause your blood pressure to drop.  The nurse came in and started my IV (and it looked like a massacre happened in the room, the nurse had blood everywhere!) and got enough blood for my lab work.  They started the fluids at 125ml/hr. (1 liter of fluids at 125ml/hr meant it would finish in 8 hours!)  I looked at Jon and told him that at that rate I would never be able to get my epidural before the baby came!  My doctor came back in and broke my water.  It was not comfortable sitting in warm fluid.  They had to change out the pads under me often! Not very long after my water was broken the contractions became unbearable!  I was doing my best to breathe through them.  Jon was right there with me coaching me through it all.  I must have called out to the nurses station a handful of times to tell them that I needed something for pain.  They had already called the anesthesiologist and he was to be there any minute.  Well any minute seemed like days to me at this point.  I have never felt pain to intense in my life.  I was coming out of the bed.  There was one time I looked at Jon through my tears and told him that I couldn't do it anymore.  I was doing my best not to scream out in pain (after all, I didn't want to be heard throughout the unit).  The only things getting me through each contraction was knowing that the pain wouldn't last forever and that with each contraction I was hopefully making more progress making it even closer to time to meet our baby girl.  Finally the anesthesiologist got there and set up and had my epidural going.  He was my savior!  I was able to feel my legs and move them but I was not in any pain at all.  I could feel my stomach tighten with each contraction but I did not feel any pain.  I was a new woman!
Around 5:00 PM they decided to start pitocin to help keep the labor progress going.  The nurse checked me again around 6:00 PM and I was 8-9 cm dilated! What great news!  Lillian's head was still not all the way engaged so they had me sit up in bed with my legs crossed and "labor down."  I was becoming more excited and more anxious now.   It was really happening, I was really going to meet this baby I had been carrying for 10 months!
The next shift came on and the nurse came in and introduced herself and let me know the plan.  They wanted me to "labor down" for a little while longer, allowing Lillian to move further down and also allowing my cervix to completely dilate.  She informed me that I could start pushing but that it may mean I would have to push longer and she didn't want me to have to do that.  I was okay with waiting because I was not in any pain and I wanted what was best for the baby.  The tech came in the room and got everything all set up for the doctor and for delivery.  It really got real then!
Around 8:30 PM the nurse came back in and checked me and said she wanted me to do some "practice pushing."  My massive legs (I say massive because they were blown up from all the fluids) went into the stirrups and the nurse told me to bear down as though I was having a bowel movement.  (Which might I add is hard to do when you don't really want to have a bowel movement!)  I pushed like this for about 30 minutes and then I began to feel really dizzy and light headed.  I wasn't sure if it was my blood sugar because I had not eaten since I pigged out at Tacomania the night before or if I was not breathing adequately as I was pushing.  Either way, we took a break and the nurse went to call the doctor to let her know we were about ready to have this baby.  My doctor got there about 9:15 PM and I started pushing again.  It was really hard work and exhausting, but Jon was really helping me out, keeping me calm and coaching me through it.  I started to feel as though I wasn't getting anywhere with all the pushing I was doing until everyone in the room got excited and made me push one more time.  That was it!  At 9:52 PM our baby girl arrived into this world.  She was laid on my chest and immediately I began to cry!  It was all worth it!  All 10 months, all the pain, all the swelling, all for a healthy 8 lb 4 oz girl.  My heart was immediately so happy!

Lillian's Birth Story {Part 1}

On February 21st I went to my scheduled doctor's appointment, the first I might add, that Jon was not able to make it to.  We had seen the doctor 3 days before, so we knew what to expect at this appointment.  She was going to check to see if I was dilated any more and we would set a date for induction.  Jon and I had already discussed what we wanted, so I knew going to the appointment just where he and I stood.  At the appointment I found out that I was only 2 cm dilated and maybe 50% effaced.  We set an induction date.  I was to check in to the hospital on Sunday at midnight and get the process started.  We planned for Lillian to be born on her due date, February 25th.  My doctor was not on call that weekend but gave me her cell number just in case something happened.  I went by the hospital after my appointment and registered.  I then went on to work.  That afternoon at work I had a few contractions but nothing serious and I just went about my business.  That evening Jon and I went to the park and walked.  I tried to talk myself out of walking because I didn't feel it was getting anything accomplished, but Jon wouldn't let me.
Friday I woke up and went to work.  It was just another day for me.  I went about the day doing all the normal things.  Towards the end of the work day my back was hurting, but I didn't think much of it.  That night Jon and I went to dinner with his parents. I pigged out on mexican food at Tacomania! My back continued to hurt throughout dinner so I ended up taking some Tylenol.  It was a constant ache so I still didn't think much of it.  Once we got home I decided to take a warm bath to see if that would relieve my back pain.  It seemed to help a little, at least it helped me relax enough to go to sleep.
Around 4:30 AM Saturday morning I woke up because my back was bothering me again.  I laid in bed and the pain seemed to go away and I was able to fall back asleep.  Not too much longer I woke up again with back pain.  I thought maybe I was laying the wrong way.  Sleeping had not been comfortable for quite a few weeks at this point anyway so I still didn't think much of it.  It wasn't until about 6:30 in the morning that I realized this back pain was coming and going.  I then got on my phone and googled "back labor."  I really didn't think I was in labor, but I wanted to see what I could find and how others may have described their contractions.  I also sent out a text to two of my closest friends to ask if they thought it was contractions and if I was in labor.  I also searched the app store and found an app that timed my contractions.  At this point the pain (or contractions) were 8-10 minutes apart.  They were becoming more uncomfortable so I climbed out of bed and leaned against the side of the bed and rocked my hips back and forth.  It really helped!  I heard back from the friends I had text and both said that they only had contractions in their back and they both felt I was in labor.   I waited until about 7:45 and decided to finally wake Jon.  I didn't want him to wake in a panic, so I calmly told him that he might want to go ahead and wake up and get some things together for his hospital bag and that I was getting in the shower. (I was not going to the hospital with greasy hair!)  I don't think it really registered with him that I thought I was in labor because I was so calm and told him I was going to take a shower.  While I was in the shower he came in the bathroom and asked how long I had been having contractions and how far apart they were.   I informed him that it started around 4:30 that morning and that they were currently 6-7 minutes apart.  He remained calm, just like I was, and proceeded to pack his bag.  He also decided to unload and load the dishwasher.  I finished getting ready, including straightening my hair.  I helped him finish cleaning up the kitchen and then I decided to clean the guest bathroom because I knew we would be having guests visit once we got home and I needed to make sure the bathroom was clean!  Jon took a shower and got all ready.  We went over my lists of things to pack for me, him, and Lillian and double checked that we had everything ready to go.  At this point my contractions were about 5 minutes apart.  They were growing in intensity and I was having to stop and lean over when they came on.  We debated on whether we should go ahead and go to the hospital or wait.  The doctor told us that if my water broke, I was bleeding bright red blood, or had contractions that were 3-5 minutes apart we needed to go in to Labor and Delivery.  So around 10:30 we decided to load up the car and head to the hospital to see if I was truly in labor.  We got in the car, stopped and realized what was potentially about to happen, and we took a minute to say a prayer and give thanks, then off to the hospital we went.

Welcome to Parenthood!

I can't believe that our sweet baby girl has already been here for a week! I told her last night that she needs to stop growing up so fast! This week has really flown by and went a little something like this...
Saturday- Happy Birthday Lillian! I plan to write a separate post with her birth story.

*first family pic*

Sunday- We were still in the hospital but were blessed with lots of visitors who came to meet our baby girl.
Monday- We got discharged from the hospital and got home around 4 in the afternoon. Our first night at home was pretty good. She woke up about every 2 hours to eat, but mommy and daddy didn't get much rest between the time it took to feed and change her and put her back to sleep, to the fact that she was already having reflux and we were scared something was going to happen to her if we fell asleep.
Tuesday- We were up and about early headed to the pediatrician to have Lillian's bilirubin level checked. (It was 14.8) We also spoke with the doctor about her awful reflux. She agreed with us that it's not very common for a baby her age and she said we needed to wait until my milk came in to see if it got better. The rest of the day went by and did include a little sunbathing to help get her bili down. Then night time was upon us. It was an awful night that consisted of pretty much no sleep for anyone in the house.

*she loved sunbathing*

Wednesday- Totally exhausted, we were up and headed to the pediatrician again to have her bilirubin checked. It went up to 15, so we sunbathed more that afternoon. Our friends, Kay and Matthew and their son Luke, came to visit. It was nice seeing them and sharing a few good laughs. That night Jon and I took turns staying awake holding Lillian while the other slept. Yes, I'm sure we sound like lunatics but it worked for us and we actually were able to get some sleep.

*Luke and Lillian*

Thursday- (Jon's 31st birthday) A little more rested we headed back to the doctor's office and found out her bilirubin was down to 14.1!! Once it starts going down it doesn't go back up so we were really happy. That afternoon Lillian had newborn pictures taken. She did so good and slept so well. Come to find out my milk had come in the night before at some point and now she was getting a belly full and was able to sleep much better. Thursday evening our friends Billy and Jennifer and their daughter, Riley came over and brought us dinner to celebrate Jon's birthday. It was so nice of them and we really enjoyed their company. Thursday night our baby girl slept so well, which meant mommy and daddy did too!

*she loves taking a bath*

Friday- It was nice to not have to get up and dressed right away to go to the doctor. Jon's uncle and his wife Danna came in for the day to visit and meet Lillian. We had a really nice visit with them that unfortunately was cut short. I called my doctor to let her know that my swelling was not getting better and almost seemed to be worse. Just before I called I had Jon check my blood pressure and to our surprise it was 152/98. I let the doctor know and they wanted us to come in right away. We all three loaded up and off to the doctor we went. Almost immediately they sent us to the hospital. I was freaking out, which was not helping my blood pressure at all! At the hospital they started checking my blood pressure every 15 minutes and drew a ton of lab work. The doctor wanted to make sure I wasn't going into preeclampsia or developing HELLP syndrome. While at the hospital my blood pressure got up to 170/104. After resting in bed for quite a while my blood pressure came down to 130s/80s. The doctor came in after we were there about 4 hours to let us know that all my lab work looked great. He wanted to keep me overnight but agreed to let me go home since Jon could check my blood pressure. He discharged me with instructions for strict bed rest and started me on a medicine for my blood pressure. We came home that night and I immediately got on the couch and stayed there all night. Poor Jon had to take care of me and Lillian. Lots of extra prayers were said that night.

*Lillian with her Great Uncle Jeff and Great Aunt Danna*

Saturday- Lillian did great the night before so we (well me for sure, not so much Jon since he was doing everything except feeding her) started the day feeling pretty rested. My first blood pressure check that morning was in the 120s/80s. Alleluia! We were able to let out a little sigh of relief. That morning Aunt Candace came in town to visit and meet Lillian. Our day consisted of lounging on the couch and loving on our week old baby. Our sweet friends, Paul and Mary, brought us dinner and dessert. It was so delicious! I know Jon was super thankful since that was one less thing he had to do and worry about.  Even more thankful now for the Meal Train.  Throughout the day my blood pressure stayed good. Prayers answered! I am so very thankful for that! We ended our week with a good bath and another good night for Lillian.

*Aunt Candace and Lillian*

This week has really gone by quick. There have been lots of ups and downs. Lillian started out the week pretty rough with her high bili and severe reflux but ended on a good note with her bili going down and minor reflux! I, on the other hand, have ended the week on a stressful note but hopefully things are getting better. I will go back to the doctor Monday and hopefully be released from bed rest.
Jon and I feel so blessed to be Lillian's parents! We don't know what we did to deserve such a beautiful and sweet baby but we are so very thankful! We are loving every second of her!

Lillian Grace Cox

Our sweet baby girl that we've been anxiously awaiting finally arrived on Saturday, February 23rd at 9:52 PM. We are so proud of her and so thankful that God has blessed us with this child! Being a mommy is more than I could ever have imagined and I'm loving every second. Jon is a wonderful daddy, just as I knew he would be. We are now a family of three!

I can see it...

the light at the end of the tunnel that is! I went back to the doctor today. I'm at 2cm now, which is not much, but it is progress from Monday. We decided that if Lillian has not made her appearance by Sunday we will be heading to the hospital to be induced. I went to the hospital after my appointment and registered. Everything is good to go now. We will be making our way to Highland hospital on Sunday around midnight and get induction going. Maybe Lillian will decide to make her debut before Sunday. Maybe she is waiting it out and wanting a little help. No matter what, we will get to meet our sweet baby girl by Monday. I'm anxious, excited, nervous, and ready! Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers for a safe delivery and a healthy baby!

39 weeks

We had our weekly appointment today. It was a few days earlier in the week than normal but that was the doctor's request. Things went well at the appointment, but were disappointing to me. I'm still 1cm dilated and 20% effaced. I have really tried this past week to get things going, but was obviously not successful. My blood pressure is still good, and I actually lost 2 pounds (guess its all the walking I have been doing). The doctor wants to see us back this Thursday and at that time we will set a date next week for induction. She doesn't want Lillian to get too big.  I know that I need to do what's best for her, but I'm definitely becoming impatient.
I am so uncomfortable these days. This swelling has really got the best of me. My right hand is constantly numb. I feel like a big butter ball. Not being able to tie my shoes is annoying.  Sleepless nights are no fun.  (I know it's just the beginning of those, but sleepless nights with a precious baby to love on will be way better than sleepless nights having to pee every hour or change position because my back is hurting)
To say I was disappointed when we left the doctor's office is an understatement.  I wanted to cry (which is not too surprising these days because I seem to cry at the drop of a hat...dang hormones).  I came home and snuggled with my sweet pups and took a nap.  It was apparently just what I needed because once I woke up I had a different outlook.  Although I am very ready, Lillian is obviously not.  I am keeping my eye on the goal, which is a healthy happy baby.  It's all in God's hands and on His timing.
On a side note, her nursery is 95% complete!   We got her bedding on Valentine's Day and immediately put it on her bed.  I love it!  It turned out perfect.  I am so thankful for Mrs. Tingle and her sewing talent!   She made our baby girl some precious bedding and saved us a ton of money!!  We put together a storage cabinet cubical thing (not sure how else to describe it), and filled it with baskets that are holding things like diapers, booty cream, wipes, blankets...you know, all the essentials.  There is a built in ledge in her room that Jon put the birdcages we had on.  We still need a few more birdcages to fill up the whole ledge.  I also need to get some white shelves for one of the walls, and two mirrors, but those are just minor things.  I'm really happy with the way her nursery has turned out.
For the next few days I will do my best to be patient.  I will keep walking.  I will keep my mind on the goal.  I will continue to pray for a healthy baby and know that He will get us there.

[tada]

[the bedding up close]

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day!!

To my hubby: Happy Valentine's Day my love!  I couldn't imagine what life would be like without you, and I am so thankful that God brought us together.  We have had many trials and many celebrations and I wouldn't change it for the world.  You make me happier than I ever could have imagined.  I enjoy going through life with you because you make it so much better!

I was hoping to be welcoming our baby girl in to this world today.  What would be sweeter than a baby on Valentine's Day?!  It looks more like I will be nursing Jon back to health.  I have to have a healthy husband before Lillian arrives!  I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.  

-1 John 4:12

38 weeks

We had our weekly appointment today and it went well.  My blood pressure is still great despite my never ending swelling!  I have gained 6 lbs in the last week and I can say it has to be at least 95% fluid!  I feel so puffy.   I am a "good 1cm" dilated and there is some effacement, she just didn't give it a percentage.  Lillian is engaged because the doc said she could feel her head.  I was very happy with all of this news!  We are scheduled to go back next Monday and if I have more progression we could talk options of induction at that time.  Our doctor is not saying she is wanting to induce, she just said that at that time we could talk more seriously about it if it was something we would be interested in.  I have mixed feelings about being induced.  This week Jon and I will for sure have many discussions on what we feel we should do and we will also be praying for God to help us with this decision.  Hopefully God and Lillian have it worked out so that Jon and I don't have to make the decision and she will just make her debut all on her own.
I have not been sleeping well, which makes for a grumpy me, especially in the mornings.  The puffiness is affecting not only my hands causing the carpal tunnel, but now I am having trouble with the alignment of my teeth when I close my mouth.  My face/jaw is swollen and causing it to hurt when I close my mouth all the way.  Oh the joys of pregnancy!  Lillian is still a wiggle worm.  I hear lots of moms say that the one thing they miss about being pregnant is feeling the baby move in their tummy.  I can see why.  I still think it is such a cool feeling.  It can be uncomfortable at times, but it is still amazing to me. I have been walking as often as I can, which ended up being 3 times this past week.  As I was finishing up with my walk on Sunday I started having contractions.  Just as I thought I should start timing them they pretty much stopped.  I guess it did something though since I am dilated more this week than I was last week.
Lillian's room is pretty much finished.  We have the decal complete and it is staying on the wall, so far. We hung her bow holder and put bows on it.  I finished another DIY project and hung it above her changing table/dresser.  We still need to get some white shelves and hang them, and I want to get two mirrors to hang on either side of the latest DIY project.  Her bedding is not yet complete, but I anticipate it won't be too much longer.  We are not really pressed for time with her bedding anyway because she will be sleeping in our room in a bassinet for at least a few weeks.
This weekend I am going to try to put together some meals that can be frozen.  I have pinned quite a few options, so we will see what I can come up with.  In those first few weeks that Lillian is here I think it will definitely help to have dinner already made, be able to pull it out of the freezer and heat it up!  Oh yea, don't forget about the Meal Train!  We would be so grateful for any food people want to bring us, and we would love to see you and for you to meet our sweet Lillian!
Jon and I are really getting anxious and excited about meeting our baby girl!  We are trying to be as patient as possible!

{THE decal}

{DIY project hanging above her changing table}

{38 weeks}

Full Term

We've made it to full term status. Our doctor's appointment went well today. I lost 2 pounds- woohoo! My blood pressure is still great! She said I may be about about a fingertip dilated. I didn't figure we would have much progress. I haven't had many contractions. In fact, I think I had my first real contraction yesterday when I was out walking. It definitely stopped me in my tracks and took my breath away for a second. Speaking of walking, I've been trying to go as much as possible. I think I made it 3 different times in the last week. The doctor told me to keep walking and that may help get things going. I guess if nothing else it will help keep my weight down. I have been feeling pretty good for the most part. Still having issues with carpal tunnel. I have been sleeping in the splints my sister sent to me. They definitely help, but by the end of the day my thumb, pointer finger, and middle finger on my right hand are numb. Having numb fingers definitely makes starting an IV at work difficult! I am still sleeping in 2 hour increments, and on occasion I will sleep for longer periods of time. I feel lots of pressure on my pelvic bone, which causes me to really waddle these days! Lillian is still an active thing. I really don't know how she still has room to wiggle around, but she does! I keep telling her that if she would just come out, she would have even more room to wiggle around, but apparently she's comfy in there.
We started working on putting the tree decal up on her wall. It has become a chore! We have heavy texture on our walls so the decal is not wanting to stick quite right. We should get it finished within the next few days. We washed and sanitized all her bottles and pacifiers. We packed her bag. I have all the stuff together for our bags but haven't yet actually put it all in the bag.
My sweet co-workers had a surprise "baby shower" at work the other day.  They are very good secret keepers!  I am very blessed to have the job that I do and work with the people I work with.  They have been so kind and understanding throughout this whole pregnancy.  I am so thankful for the car seat base (we really needed a 2nd one!), the cute outfits, and the Target gift card they gave me!  I can not begin to thank them enough.
This weekend I plan on finishing up her room, which should not consist of much. The decal should be up by the weekend. I will get Jon to hang things on the walls, like the shelves, her bow holder, and the next DIY project I plan on getting done soon. I will have Jon put the bird cages up on the built in ledge. The bedding is in the works of being made, and I am so excited! It's going to be so cute!!
On a side note...our sweet friends, Kelli and Nathan (Ethan's parents), welcomed their new baby boy, Evan into the world yesterday. We had the opportunity to meet him last night and he's so perfect. I am so excited for them and look forward to Evan and Lillian being best buds!
Well for now I guess we will just finish up the last minute details, walk, walk, walk, and try to wait patiently for our baby girl's arrival.

36 weeks

We are in our 36th week of pregnancy.  Yes, that's 9 months of being pregnant.  I'm not sure who started lying to us girls when we were younger but people always say humans carry a baby for 9 months when in actuality it's 10 months.  We had our now weekly appointment today and baby girl is still just hanging out in there.  No dilation.  She's not even engaged in my pelvis.  I was surprised by this because it sure does feel like she is!  My swelling is still there, along with the carpal tunnel.  My blood pressure is still wonderful, thankfully!  The iron I have been taking has apparently done its job because my hemoglobin is right where it should be.
I have been feeling pretty good for the most part.  I'm still uncomfortable at night trying to sleep.  I'm annoyed when I wake up in the morning and my fingers are numb, and I can hardly fix my hair or put on makeup.  My reflux has not been so bad lately and for that I am very thankful!  Lillian is still an active little girl, well maybe not so little these days.
Her nursery is coming right along.  The walls are painted. The dresser is complete and full of clothes.  All her clothes are clean and either folded and put away or hanging in the closet.  The fabric for her bedding is ordered and should be in this week.  We have all her goodies (pack n play, swing, stroller, etc.) put together and in their places.  I finished another DIY for her room that I am very happy with the outcome.  I am planning on working on another this weekend.  We still need to hang the shelves in her room.  I ordered a tree decal for her wall behind her crib, and we plan on hanging it this weekend.  I am excited that her room is finally all coming together.
I made lists of everything we need to pack in our bags, so hopefully this weekend I will get those all done.  Jon has the carseat base in his car, it's just not actually strapped in yet, but I'm sure that will be done soon too.  I am also planning within the next 2 weeks sometime to put together a few meals that can be frozen so that we will have them for those first days after we get home.  My sweet friend and co-worker, Amber, also created a meal train for us.  In case you haven't heard of a meal train...it is a website that organizes meal giving.  Someone sets it up for the couple or person and people can go on to the website and sign up for a day to bring a meal.  It's an awesome idea and will be really helpful in those first few busy, stressful days when we get home from the hospital.  To check out our meal train just click this link...Danielle & Jon's Meal Train

{DIY decor for the nursery}

{36 weeks}

Showered with Love

On January 12th a group of sweet friends and co-workers hosted a baby shower for me and Lillian. My sister was also one of the hostess and was able to come in town, along with my sweet friend, Adrianne, from Fort Worth. It was so wonderful and filled my heart with so much joy. I was overwhelmed with the love for me and Lillian expressed by everyone that was there! We received so many awesome gifts that I am so grateful for! Here are a few pictures from the shower...

[the beautiful-and delicious-cake my sweet friend, and now mommy, Kay had made]

[Lillian's going home outfit from my MIL]

[Kelli filled one of Ethan's baskets with goodies for Lillian-what a sentimental gift!]

[with Lillian's grandmothers]

[with the sweet hostesses-minus Kay who was headed home from the hospital with her 2 day old]

[the travel system we registered for-the gift from the wonderful hostesses]

On January 27th my sisters in law, along with my MIL and mother, hosted a beautiful baby shower for us.  It was a great time with family and friends.  I am still so thankful for all the gifts and love that everyone has shown for Lillian.  She is one blessed little girl already!!

[super cute bow holder- thankfully she is going to have a lot of hair and will need lots of bows]

[the sweet hostesses bought Lillian a swing! we will be using that often]

[with the hostesses]

[cute decor]

[more cute decor]

[the yummy cake my MIL had made]

Today at work a patient's wife gave me a blanket that she made for Lillian.  It is so beautiful and really meant a lot knowing she thought about me and our sweet baby girl.  I feel so blessed and truly loved by everyone!  I think we are officially ready for Lillian Grace!

The truth about pregnancy...

...or my pregnancy at least.

For as long as I can remember I always thought pregnant women were so cute!  I love pregnant bellies and pretty much every pregnant person I see is so precious.  Then you see maternity pics like this...

*never in a million years could I personally take a pic like this*

and it leads to believe that pregnancy is not only cute but can be sexy too.  Well this pregnant girl definitely does not feel sexy (that was never really a pre-pregnant feeling anyway) and it's hard to even feel cute most days!

In the first trimester you just feel tired and crummy majority of the time.  If you are like me, your skin becomes incredibly oily and you look as though you've just hit puberty with unbelievable acne.  As your body is getting used to (or not accepting) all the new hormones raging in your body you get to experience things like constipation and frequent urination. 

*just a glimpse at what my acne looked like in the beginning...GROSS*

When you get to the second trimester you finally have a little bump and it's pretty exciting.  People can usually start to tell that you are carrying a baby in your belly and not one too many six packs.  You actually start to get your energy back and begin to think that pregnancy is not so bad after all.  You do start to gain more weight, so most likely your wardrobe does not fit anymore, therefore maternity clothes become your best friend.  (I'm thinking of wearing panel pants forever!)  At this point you may also start swelling.  Putting your feet up whenever possible is the best thing at this time.  You also may need to wear compression socks.  And don't be surprised if you are really limited as to what shoes you can wear.

*just putting my feet up while I had a chance at work*

*compression socks are a lifesaver*

Then you get to the third trimester.  You can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel, yet it still seems so far away.  By this point your belly is so large that everyone and their mother feel the need to tell you that you are about to pop.  You no longer walk anymore, but instead waddle.  The swelling that started in the 2nd trimester is only worse and even starts to cause carpal tunnel.  The carpal tunnel is so bad in the morning that you can barely put on makeup and straightening your hair is totally out of the question.  You sleep in 2-3 hour intervals, waking to attempt to get comfortable or get up to pee.  Speaking of peeing, if you don't go to the bathroom often, it's likely that you may wet your pants if you sneeze, cough, laugh, or heck, maybe even take a deep breath.  Maternity clothes don't seem to fit or feel cute anymore, instead you want to wear sweat pants and your husband's oversized shirts. 

Your body goes through some crazy changes during pregnancy.  Some days you don't feel human and you wonder if your body will ever be what it was 9 months ago. 

Please don't take all this the wrong way...I am very grateful for the opportunity to be pregnant.  I am so thankful for an uncomplicated pregnancy and so far a healthy baby.  I am so anxious and excited about meeting our sweet baby girl.  I know that all this craziness called pregnancy will be totally worth it once I get to see Lillian and kiss her sweet face.  Until she arrives I will do my best to make the most of this pregnancy and take care of her and protect her while I can.